It’s Glasgow. It’s warm and it’s not raining. The police, however, are everywhere so I had better take cover somewhere soon and, with a man in a silver crash helmet lurking outside, my refuge was surely going to be the Oran Mor with Colonel Mustard & The Dijon 5, Rail Fan and Henge there to provide distraction from imminent arrest.
Rail Fan first. Chris Wilson had the voice of a man on a mission yet this Stirling band seemed driven, despite their country chord influences, by the ghost of British blues rock. Like a smart man once said, a rose by any other name would sound the same.
Henge, in contrast, took a more theatrical approach with the costume department of a seventies Dr Who episode having been duly raided for the purpose of providing a reason to keep your wandering eyes on the stage. The band were no mere time travelling meat puppets though as they possessed the kind of killer rhythmic solidity that could turn any floor into a dancefloor. They also had dancing girl mushrooms, or should that be dancing mushroom girls? A matter for the philosophers perhaps but my mind is expanding all the way to Gallifrey anyway.
On to Colonel Mustard & The Dijon 5. Never seen them before but wish I had. The mere fact that they had an enthusiastic audience – a Yellow Movement to give them their Sunday name – was proof that something out of the ordinary was about to explode in your face with “International Sex Hero” and the hypnotically surreal “Bouncy Ball” easily firing up the party afterburners and, although audience pleasing dance alongs might well be their trademark, only the terminally blinkered could have missed the joyful subversion that weaved intelligence into their words. If you want to know what anarchy in the UK really sounds like in the 21st century, then you need listen to Colonel Mustard & The Dijon 5. Fact!
You can smell the sweat in the room, fringes are forever cute and I am now at one with the world. Sparkle on, brothers and sisters, for my colour is now yellow. Just like the hi-vis vests that the police wear…